Recently I was involved in a debate ‘Is God bad for women’. The conclusion was easily reached – absolutely not! However the panel was not in agreement over much else. The sticking point was whether or not the bible teaches that women should submit to men. It was salient that individuals experiences had driven them to re-examine the so called ‘difficult women passages’ and come to new conclusions. Two experiences in particular had been ground changing: the first was that of a man who met gifted women who were both able to teach and to lead; the second was a woman who felt she had been ‘called’ to the ministry. It is hard in a debate to challenge experiences for all sorts of reasons but our experience and feelings are not a reliable barometer of truth. In fact they can cause a problem because they can shape our reading and study of the bible and drive us to find what we are looking for. It is extremely hard to come to the bible and honestly seek to understand it and submit to its authority. Initially I came at this issue from a similar direction.
I went to a left-wing university and was taught by radical feminists. I considered myself a ‘Christian feminist’ and was convinced that passages such as 1 Timothy 2:11-15, 1 Corinthians 11:2-16, and 1 Corinthians 14:34-35 in particular could be simply resolved. For a while I took the position that these passages were simply culturally and historically limited to both Corinth and Ephesus but no longer binding on us. That position was easy to hold because I did not really read and study either book in depth.
I am convinced that many Christians continue to do the same. I speak with lots of young women (some who have even told me they feel called to the ministry) who have never studied these passages or ever been taught them. Some do not even know that these ideas are in the bible!
I want to thank Hugh Palmer (now rector at All Soul’s Langham Place) who allowed me (actually encouraged me) to work through these passages in a small group at St Helen’s Church, Bishopsgate. I came equipped with all my arguments, I read and read feminist theologians and tried out my arguments in the group. I don’t ever remember backing down publicly during that time but even as I tried out these arguments I could feel their weakness. It wasn’t long before I knew the real issue was whether or not I was prepared to submit to the authority of the bible on an issue that cut me to the core. I loved teaching the bible and this seemed to restrict my freedom and opportunities.
Since that time I have learnt so much more. I can now not only submit to this pattern in relationships but also rejoice in them and understand that it is good. My husband has played an essential part in this –teaching me that to submit to him is not restricting but liberating. He has encouraged me to learn and to teach the bible as much as possible under his headship and the male leadership of the Church. I thank God for him.
After the debate a number of people told me I was brave taking the position I did. It was not bravery but conviction. This conviction is a result of God’s work in my life teaching me primarily that the whole issue of submission is really about whether I am prepared to submit to the authority of His word or my culture. The amazing thing is how much working this through has helped me value what Christ has done for us as our bridegroom – it has made me love Him more.
I want to encourage others to really grapple with these things especially women – we must work out what it means to be godly women if we seek to serve Christ. We need to understand gender issues if we are going to stand on issues concerning sexuality. But if you hate these passages and want to avoid them try to come to them fresh, ask God to teach you and remember: ‘Your attitude should be the same as Christ Jesus’ Philippians 2:5.
For those of you who are interested below is a brief summary of some conclusions that I have come to:
There are two places where submission is asked for particularly from women – marriage and the Church.
What submission doesn’t mean
• It does not mean that men and women are unequal in any way.
• It does not mean that women are intellectually, morally, or emotionally inferior to men.
• It does not mean that women are under the authority of all men.
• It does not mean that women are to be confined to the home.
• It does not mean that women cannot pursue careers, earn a salary, or have authority over men in the workplace.
• It does not mean that women cannot study theology, or be rigorous in handling the bible.
• It does not mean women can never teach in any circumstance.
• It does not mean that men tell women what to do (husbands are to love and overseers are to teach).
What submission means:
• In the gathered congregation women do not have authority to teach and lead the household of God – (this is true for most men too).
• Women should seek to serve Christ and be godly (true for men too)
• In the household of God women should be involved in actively serving in a myriad of ways including teaching, especially other women and children, but also in some circumstances men.
• In the world women should be engaged in evangelism (true for men too).
• In marriage women should submit to their husbands – this will work out in many different ways depending on the couple.
• Women should display something of the Churches relationship to Christ in their marriages. Men should display something of Christ’s sacrificial love for the Church in marriage.
• Women should teach and instruct their children with their husbands.
• Women can rejoice in their ‘womanhood’.
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